I'm sleepy, sleepy, sleepy... a little whiny but not as whiny as I was two nights ago... I had a pretty good PE class that afternoon but the weight of the Filipino project weighed down on me afterwards...
And as a result of that I did something that I haven't done in a long time... I cried... okay I cried when Pia and I watched Click but this was the first time I cried out of stress and frustration. This was the first time I cried in class since I entered UST, yes I was inside our room and I just cracked. My next class did not begin yet so the crying thing was before my Philosophy class. I broke down a bit out of frustration as Ge and Parpie were telling me about the progress on our Filipino project. And before that I really did looked drained, Ana and Edree said so. I looked pale and stuff, a result of the stress.
I didn't go ballastic though. I was just silently crying. My blockmates were trying to comfort me which wasn't helping because it made me cry even more. I got over it quickly though I just needed the outlet. The semester's frustration was somehow released in a few minutes spent crying. What can I say? It was my own little Mariah Carey (nervous breakdown). Edree was pretty surprised with my little episode because she said that it was totally unlike me which is the truth most of the time but I am human after all...
I still have a lot of things to do though... the weekend plus the class suspension on Monday is just enough to get me by... I have to submit another topic outline because my topic was rejected for an essay in English class (that added to the stress) although that is a bit of a blessing in disguise because I then do not have to write the entire first draft of my essay, I just have to submit an outline, okay two outlines because she has us doing one more on personal freedom. Then I have to research on the types of conscience for Philosophy although I do not need that until Thursday. At least I finished my Filipino paper but I will check it tomorrow morning before I meet up with Mayi at UST because our papers have to be bound so I'll be at UST tomorrow around 11 to meet up wth Mayi and but I'll probably be at the library first. I have to make my report for History this weekend too on Cambodia, I have a presentation on Wednesday.
Okay I just needed to get out what I need to accomplish this weekend. It's crazy but there is nothing I could do. Just work harder I guess and smile... something I forget to do. Life is still good... the tears just helped wash away all the pain and frustration for me so that I will be able to see the brand new day. May all of you be able to do the same.
4 comments:
Kaya yan =)
I have an idea of how busy you are, judging by the GMs from everyone *cough*PAULA*cough* haha =)
You'll get through this =D If others can, you can. Ikaw pa. :)
I personally think that crying is good. It lessens some of the weight that you have in your heart, or shoulders, or mind or whatever.
Basta hang in there. :) *hugs*
Just let it all out, dearest.
***
I remember crying myself. Almost everyday, especially during the Paskuhan week. Of course, I didn't show it to everyone. I prefer crying by myself.
When I cry about school-related stuff Icheal used to tell me not to take things too seriously. I couldn't help it though, since I was the president. But Icheal and Poli made me forget most of my worries--we would hang out in different places and stuff.
You still have your friends, and you can depend on them. After all their help, it's up to you if you still want to stand up.
thanks you two! i miss you both... i know and i agree with both of you... hope you two are doing well right now! really miss you!
thank you mish! i'll link you too!
i did feel a lot better after crying... : ) thanks again!
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