Good Girl Gone Bad?

It was a big change and without any hesitation I dove head first into it. I shut out all the negative voices and when full steam ahead. Don't worry I'm not talking about anything as drastic as plastic surgery. I'm just talking about this:



TADA!!! I took the Rihanna photos from Ultimate Rihanna and my picture is courtesy of Ms. Ana Mae Roa. Thank you!!

I went from the slightly unmanageable shoulder-length do to this Rihanna inspired bob. Edree even went as far as to call me the "BLACK GIRL GONE WHITE." I think it would be more appropriate to say: "BLACK GIRL GONE ASIAN."

What made me do this?

I needed the change. I had an epiphany after the little drama I was in recently (refer to the previous entry). It made me want to do something drastic. It made me want to create a new beginning for myself.

I gained confidence from the positive feedback my friends have been giving me. This whole experience reminded me of the boundless opportunities waiting for me. The world is in my palm. Carpe diem! Seize the day. Wait I have to watch that movie first before I can go all carpe diem on you people... HAHA

It is my own rebellion. Like Rihanna said in an interview on the Today Show, there is that time when I teenager wants to rebel against anything and everything. This is my own little revolution.

So in a way I've become that good girl gone bad. I'm fighting against all those people who looked down on what I can do. I'm fighting against all those nay-sayers. My future is bright. The possibilities are endless. This has become a new beginning for me.

It Keeps Me Happy

I'm functioning on a cup of tea and a bottle of water. I was up at 5 this morning because I knew I had to finish the paper for my Info Tech in the Newsroom class. I have no time for dilly-dallying. I've been averaging 6 hours of sleep this week. That's terrible for me because I love my 8 hours a night sleep. I miss it but I've been kept happy by the most trivial of things.

The sunrise has been my friend. I would not have said that before because mornings used to be my enemy but I've come to appreciate and love them now. It gives me warmth and hope that the day would be a great one. I'm trying to cultivate my optimism.

ARASHI's still LOVE. Ohmiya's still LOOOVEEE and MatsuJun's SEX. LOL Well he is! Their songs and shows have kept me perky and happy. I've been battling with my inner demons a.k.a. my emotions and they have been my salvation. It's been a great stress reliever. I'm thankful to Johnny and the rest Johnny Entertainment for giving us the five pretty boys. Now if they only sold legal Arashi merchandise here... I'm still praying and hoping for that.

Friends and family have also kept me sane. From the recent demands of my academic life, they have been my shelter. The load isn't that demanding yet but it's beginning to build up momentum.

Songs have continued to be refuge as well. Arashi's La Tormenta 2004 is my current hype me up song. Avril's new song When You're Gone is something I'm in love with. Love the chorus... it's a sad song but it makes me happy. Amy Winehouse's Tears Dry On Their Own is rather fitting for me and I LOVE IT.

I have found that hidden passion for my profession yesterday. That's keeping me happy. I had a practical exam for the Philippine Daily Inquirer's University Scholarship where we had to interview and write a feature story on the chief of the Research Section of PDI. Ma'am Miner was nice and despite the harrowing feeling of trying to meet the deadline, I actually had fun.

In retrospect, I knew that this moment would come down in history. I actually got to experience typing inside a newsroom. The newsroom of the biggest newspaper publication no less. It was cool and I believe I gave what I could despite the pressure. We were there at 5 in the afternoon and finished the interview-slash-press con scenario in the Inquirer's research dept at 6. I finished the article at 8. The time limit was probably midnight or something. We just had to pass it to Sir Yambot (the PDI publisher) that night. It was eye opening and inspiring. I can never describe the feeling of being in there amidst practicing newsmen. It's rather fascinating.

I was talking about battling with my demons earlier and it was put into words through a quote I received last night.

When things seem too good to be true, it's because of one thing: It's about to break your heart.

I found things that made me happy and I think that kept my emotions at bay. Because my friendship with a certain boy reached the point where I know that friendship was all he could offer me. It was too good to be true. It doesn't matter that the moment didn't last long. I knew something was wrong. Okay now my pessimism is surfacing. I was prepared for this. It is even in this entry HERE. I'm just letting the emotion pass through me. It hasn't hit as hard and that surprises me a bit. The anticipation probably prepared me for the actual thing. Good for me... HAHA

In Amy Winehouse's words:

I don't know why I got so attached
It's my responsibility
You don't owe nothing to me
But to walk away I have no capacity

He walks away the sun goes down
He takes the day but I'm grown
And in your way,
In this blue shade
My tears dry on their own

I don't understand
Why do I stress a man?
When there's so many better things at hand
We could've never had it all
We had to hit a wall
So this is inevitable withdrawal
Even if I stop wanting you
and perspective pushes through
I'll be some next man's other woman soon
I shouldn't play myself again
I should just be my own best friend.
Not fuck myself in the head with stupid men

I love that last line. Okay I should stop here...

*****

This will be a new feature on my blog. Since I want to spread Arashi love every entry would have my favorite picture of the moment. This one takes this entry hands down... one of the hottest Arashi pics I have seen. o.O Credit: lea26karla.livejournal.com

Multitasking Heaven

My serious multitasking skills come in handy in times like this. I get bored by studying too much. Contrary to popular belief, I don't not lock myself up and study all day. It's the opposite of that. I get sudden bursts of inspiration to study but that happens sporadically. I'm still the same lazy, procrastinating girl.

Although I've managed a way to finish most of the things that are asked of me. The seat plans are done. I'm just waiting for my block mates pictures. I read the Psych handouts and did a little advance reading. But I couldn't comprehend the Glossary part. I will try to do that later. Done my research for Lit. Although I'm still reading up on Ramayana as we speak (one of the many tasks I'm performing right now). I am also preparing the first part of my interview questions for my friend Nikki.

Everything is going pretty well. And I'm fighting all urge to just forget researching and re-reading the notes (something I'll be doing later) I have. It's hard but I'm trying to cultivate my self-discipline. I've been battling with it all my life. I feel like I haven't won any battle against my laziness. It's a surprise how I get anything done.

School's starting to get hectic. I'm a Junior already. No place for monkey business. Journalism is the main focus now. Except for a few stray classes. All we're talking about now are news, beats, feature articles, and the media. I enjoy the fact that I actually have an area I can relate to. You see I can't imagine myself taking any other course. I enjoy reading books on Journalism. That's something I discovered recently. Things are busy but they're great too. It really does make things a little easier when you like what you're doing.

I'm still sucked into the world of Arashi. That's pretty much why I'm in front of this computer. I'm in love. LOL I've been taking pictures, watching and downloading videos. It's an obsession. My PC is filled with so much Arashi stuff. But it's a really good stress reliever for me. They make me laugh and I get all kilig every once in awhile (thanks to Nino and Jun). Life is good. HAHA It would seem that I have turned into a serious fangirl.



I can't help but smile every time I look at this.

*GIF courtesy of hanya_ne.livejournal.com

The "Great Global Warming Swindle" And Something Totally Unrelated To It

My eyes were opened today to how gullible I can actually get. It took this documentary on global warming to realize it. If you have the time and resources, you should download "Great Global Warming Swindle". It has completely changed my opinion on the whole "phenomenon" that is global warming. More information on the documentary HERE.

I'm so angered and frustrated by people who feed the masses with unreliable information just for the sake of getting them to turn to their side. Most of them do it for personal gain and that really pisses me off. Global warming is no longer an environmental issue. It's nothing more than a sensationalized political issue. We are continually being fed lies.

I don't know the entire truth. But my faith in the whole global warming movement just went down the drain. I'm trying to do online research on it. I want to find out the truth. I no longer want to be deceived by the media and their powerful backers. I know I'm taking up Journalism and all but the media today can be so underhanded and dirty that it just makes me sick.

My dad was the one who got me to watch this and I am so thankful to him. He also reminded me of words that I never really understood or took to heart before. He said that I should never, ever believe everything I hear. I should listen to the opposing side and believe the more credible and logical side. It's good advice especially for a future journalist. It is so easy to fall for every single rumor out there. Logic and common sense should always be used.

****

Now on something totally unrelated to that.

I'm supposed to put up the hottie of the month entry but I decided to do that tomorrow. I just wanted to drop by and say hi! Okay now I can go... HAHA just kidding!

I've been reading through my past entries and it's a little nostalgic and scary. Everything seems like a world away and I realized that I was a very whiny teen. Okay I'm still a whiny teen but I can't help but laugh over all the "problems" I was bitching about. I guess it is true that things in life that suck right now could be a source of laughter in the future. Okay not the most eloquent way to put it but I hope you get my point.

I'm in front of this PC at least 10 hours a day and that has certainly killed my boredom. I know a bunch of people who complain that they're bored and stuff but I never seem to run out of things to do and explore.

I'm into the Japanese boy band Arashi now so I pretty much download everything I can get my hands on. I'm still updated with One Tree Hill. My favorite show of all time! I opened up a livejournal account... HERE. I did that just so I could join the communities for Jun Matsumoto and One Tree Hill. I'll probably look for an Orlando Bloom community there. HAHA! I'm a fangirl. I'm a definite fangirl and I'm not ashamed.

I watch shows on Crunchyroll. I read the news from Inquirer, Yahoo! News, CNN, Time Magazine, and Reader's Digest (see at least I'm enriching myself... LOL). I collect celebrity photos. I read the blogs of the people I posted in the link page of my Multiply. I play WebSudoku. That's fun and highly addictive. I'm currently reading the manga of Fruits Basket online and I'm reading the graphic novel of the show Heroes.

I even watch movies and documentaries like the one in the first part of this entry. I listen and download music. I chat with friends. It's never dull. How can I be bored with all those things? And I occasionally clean out my stuff. I just do it little by little. I certainly cannot get bored with all of this.

Holy Week Jetlag

I did not go anywhere for Holy Week. I was with my family and tradition was upheld. I talked about that in my previous entry already and I wrote in because I want to talk about what happened after Maundy Thursday and Good Friday.

I mentioned that a few relatives were coming home for a little vacation and they arrived on Saturday night. It has been a whirlwind of activity since then. Since that night we have not eaten on time. Last Saturday we ate at around 9 o 'clock. On Sunday we had lunch at 3 and dinner at around 9 again. Yesterday we ate lunch at 1. Let's just say that our systems are a bit out of wack.

Their arrival made me appreciate my family more. My cousin Nicky is so adorable and gorgeous. She's so tall for an eleven-year-old and I can see good things in her future. I'm starting to see the value of spending time with family more. Summer vacation is giving me the luxury to do so. I look at my family in different perspective now. I can sum it up in these words: SLIGHTLY DYSFUNCTIONAL BUT COMPLETELY HAPPY. There are quirks and weaknesses but we have been good to each other and I'm thankful for that. I have been given a good biological family. I have an amazing set of friends who I consider family as well.

I spent my Holy Week thanking the Lord for my family. Here's to the people I know will always be there for me. They may not always get my attitude but I know that they will be there to support me no matter what. That certainly gives me the faith to carry on with my life.

Update, Update, Update

My head hurts and I feel slightly out of wack. I'm here at my tito's home in Mira-Nila because my tita and her family (except for Judica) will be coming home for a three week vacation. They migrated to Australia a long time ago and they haven't been on a vacation here in ages. I'm pretty excited to see them. But my body isn't making it easy for me.

We went to 14 churches on Maundy Thursday for the "Visita Iglesia" so that probably wacked out my system because it has been a long time since I've been out at night. Yes I'm such a homebody and a slight dork but I love staying at home. The food at Napoli's was yummy as usual though. For under 2000 pesos we got three pastas, one large pizza, another small pizza and three desserts (ony three of us eat dessert). That's for 8 people and all of us were so full by the end of the night. That's why I love that restaurant.

Okay I'm getting a bit hungry. At least we'll be having a feast tonight. It feels great when the family gets together. There really isn't anything interesting or peculiar happening in my life that's why I'm not writing in. But I'm happy that I'm getting to write poems again. I might put up a Deviant account one of these days to finally have my "portfolio". Keep you people updated on that. I should probably go. Bye!

What I've Been Up To

Hi! I've been stuck inside the world of The Sims these past two weeks. I have all the expansions plus the life stories game so that's pretty much eating up my time.

I realized how much I love having control over things. I do whatever I want with the sims and its fun. That sounds creepy I know. It shows my whole control freak side, not that I'm proud of that.

Anyway, I've also done a lot of reading these past few days. I highly recommend The Greatest Salesman In The World by Og Mandino. I very inspirational one. Finally got around to reading Mae's present. It is a chick lit entitled Pink Shoes by Katrina Atienza. I read No Boyfriend Since Birth by Claire Betita again. Yes I'm reminding myself how fabulous I am. I also read Legend by Jude Deveraux. I'm also reading my Princess Diaries collection. I'm a Meg Cabot fan and the series is very cute and hilarious (okay that sounds like a guy...).

I enjoy this little break from real life. This little lull between semesters. I have been yearning for summer for a long time already and it has not disappointed me yet. The heat's the only drawback. I just need to recharge batteries a bit. Indulge in my lazy side before I kick off another probably crazy semester. Now all I need is some island to retreat to. Anyone have their own personal islands that they would love to lend to me? Anyone??

I'll get back to you people when I have something more important and profound to say. I'm just testing out my tito's DSL and so far so good. Ciao for now!