It would be a big lie to say that we do NOT wear masks... that we don't have different facades for different occasions. We have one for being the "daughter", the "student", the "friend" and every other thing in our life that requires one. We need it... we are obliged to do it...
Why is that so? It is because we are afraid to be "found out"... we are afraid that people would see into us and realize what a big fake or what a big phony we really are. We are afraid that our true selves are just NOT GOOD ENOUGH and then we will be left with this big empty void and thinking that we should not have let our guard down, that our masks should have been worn at all times.
We are social beings and that makes us want to become who the other people wants us to be... even when we claim we aren't wearing masks, that whole "what-you-see-is-what-you-get" thing is a mask in itself if you think of it. A mask disguising our real mask. Hiding is part of the human nature. Hiding is our defense mechanism... there is nothing wrong with that but sometimes as a wise professor told us, we would tend to go back to the person we really are... when we are asked to change by someone we care for, we do it and put on that mask because we are willing to show our love for them through that but then we would again revert to our true selves and when they tell you: "NAGBAGO KA NA..." (You changed) there is this one effective line you can use on them: "HINDI AKO NAGBAGO... BUMALIK LANG AKO SA KUNG SINO TALAGA AKO..." (I did not change... I just went back to who I really am)
Fear could be the driving force for wearing masks... fear of rejection, fear of the unknown, fear of being discovered but then again should we really let fear control our lives? Should we let that fear drive us to be someone that we are truly not?
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I dedicate this entry to a great mentor... he has chosen to leave the profession to pursue something that he needs to do for himself... for the short period of time he has been with us he has opened my eyes to the endless possibilities in my own life. Good things never last and in his own words: "A man's got to do, what a man's got to do..." so for now I will be content with all the funny and inspiring anecdotes he told us; the thought of him on the verge of tears, thanking us and hoping he could have finished the semester with us and us clapping as he exited the room while seeing him wipe tears from his eyes... and then for me, the closure of seeing him walk off into one of his classes, the image of his retreating back... the symbol of saying goodbye, of bowing gracefully out of our academic lives. I was never given a personal chance to thank him so through this I do. For being a great teacher, thank you. For the laughter, thank you. For the words of wisdom and hope, thank you. Sir Neil Perez... you have been a great source of inspiration for our class and for me. Thank you very much...
Why is that so? It is because we are afraid to be "found out"... we are afraid that people would see into us and realize what a big fake or what a big phony we really are. We are afraid that our true selves are just NOT GOOD ENOUGH and then we will be left with this big empty void and thinking that we should not have let our guard down, that our masks should have been worn at all times.
We are social beings and that makes us want to become who the other people wants us to be... even when we claim we aren't wearing masks, that whole "what-you-see-is-what-you-get" thing is a mask in itself if you think of it. A mask disguising our real mask. Hiding is part of the human nature. Hiding is our defense mechanism... there is nothing wrong with that but sometimes as a wise professor told us, we would tend to go back to the person we really are... when we are asked to change by someone we care for, we do it and put on that mask because we are willing to show our love for them through that but then we would again revert to our true selves and when they tell you: "NAGBAGO KA NA..." (You changed) there is this one effective line you can use on them: "HINDI AKO NAGBAGO... BUMALIK LANG AKO SA KUNG SINO TALAGA AKO..." (I did not change... I just went back to who I really am)
Fear could be the driving force for wearing masks... fear of rejection, fear of the unknown, fear of being discovered but then again should we really let fear control our lives? Should we let that fear drive us to be someone that we are truly not?
**************************************************************************
I dedicate this entry to a great mentor... he has chosen to leave the profession to pursue something that he needs to do for himself... for the short period of time he has been with us he has opened my eyes to the endless possibilities in my own life. Good things never last and in his own words: "A man's got to do, what a man's got to do..." so for now I will be content with all the funny and inspiring anecdotes he told us; the thought of him on the verge of tears, thanking us and hoping he could have finished the semester with us and us clapping as he exited the room while seeing him wipe tears from his eyes... and then for me, the closure of seeing him walk off into one of his classes, the image of his retreating back... the symbol of saying goodbye, of bowing gracefully out of our academic lives. I was never given a personal chance to thank him so through this I do. For being a great teacher, thank you. For the laughter, thank you. For the words of wisdom and hope, thank you. Sir Neil Perez... you have been a great source of inspiration for our class and for me. Thank you very much...
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