I have been very bitter in my last entry but I won't apologize for it because I have been feeling very lousy... yes people it is Valentine's day and I have gone from having a pretty good morning... played a good game of volleyball during pe (thank you very much)... and then as we (Mae, Nikki [different Nikki], Meg and I) finished eating our "celebratory" Single & Fabolous dinner while crossing the busy street of A.H. Lacson Meg's bitterness (HAHA) sort of started to rub off on me and I felt suffocated and I wanted to strangle the next person I saw holding a big bouquet of flowers... okay that was way harsh... but I just felt so out of it.
And again I want to apologize to Rembert because I fell asleep last night! Puyatan to the max ka kasi e! HAHA Natapos mo ba yung ginagawa mo? Nagmumukmok kasi kaming dalawa nito last night... HEHE sorry ulit kasi may PE ako I had to get up at 7 and believe me maaga na yun! HAHA Remember yung promise mo sa akin?! At promise ko din sayo next year meron na ko! Hala nagtarget talaga WAHAHAHA... okay I am officially insane ladies and gentlemen.
At the beginning of today just for fun, Apa and I counted all those romantic gestures/flowers/teddy bears/stuff toys that we saw and by the time it was 1 o clock or something I quit counting at aroun 153... I just couldn't take it anymore... and we weren't really looking for those things... I could probably reach 500 if I circumnavigated (what a word!) UST... HAHA there were a bunch of creative ones like this one car was surrounded by rose petals and had I love you ____ (forgot the name) on the dashboard... then there was this guy who traced the word I love you I think in Colayco Park or something... sweet... people are such suckers during this time... I guess I probably got "sweetness" overload... if there ever was such a thing.
I feel so out of sorts right now that I'm not doing anything academic wise... I might later... whatever... I really don't have anything against Valentines (but my icon contradicts this notion HAHA) but I guess too much romance crammed into a day when it should actually be spread throughout the year got to me because no matter how people try to hide it there is still a stigma attached to being single... okay so maybe as a single person I am looking through the what was that theory called... wait let me get my sociology book... ohhh here it is:
"Idea of the looking-glass-self by Charles Horton Cooley. In our imagination, we mentally assume the stance of other people and look at ourselves as we believe these others see us. We acquire our sense of self by seeing ourselves reflected in the behavior of others and their attitudes toward us and by imagining what others think about us." (Palispis, 2005, p. 93)
Proper citing because it is a direct quote... HAHA
Anyway... maybe it is all in my mind but still through the looking-glass-self I feel that stigma... not all the time but I still feel it. People say I'm lucky but do I feel that way... honestly most of the time no... and to be sort of pushed into this "love fest" is a bit too much for someone like me... I'm not really mad at those people who had a good day like my best Rianne who has been raving in her blog, I'm actually happy for the people who felt special today but for little old me it is just too much to bear... oh well... as sarcastic as this may sound now but I am sincere when I say...
Happy Heart's Day everyone! Hope you had a day filled with love from all the special people in your lives...
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